Well, we are back on track and my art is now starting to take a turn for the better after this brief hiatus. There is still a long way to go in getting back into the groove. The creative process is a great way to keep life alive but it takes effort and continued concentration. I am selling my paintings now. So, all this to say that I am gay. It really doesn't feel that big a deal now that i've done it. It is amazing that I let everything get in the way of this realization, practically all else operating in my life. Nothing has fallen apart yet and my friends will always be my friends but as they begin to learn will have to see me in this new light. Religion was my biggest obstacle because it cut right to the core of everything I believed including how I perceive creativity. I guess I can keep the parts that work for me and let go of the things that instill fear of myself. What is the most gratifying about all these revelations I have made is that I don't resent so much people who I believe are homophobic which many are here - some even close to home. I don't feel trapped nor do i fear them anymore. The need to escape is not so immediate and my drinking is lesson that self -destruction is not an alternative path I need take. I believe I have covered everything I needed to confront and really I am very private person and what is my business is my own business and nobody else's. I really should not have had to defend that at all.
This was a journey based on love all round. The most realistic lesson of all in all this, is whomever I am I still have to earn a living and work ...life continues! Peace, love and respect ...and breathe...
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